“This event is not for the faint of heart”

By Haley Grinder
Local Journalism Initiative Reporter

Ullr bar will be bringing a unique twist to the traditional dining experience later this month. The special event, held on Feb. 26 at 8 p.m., is dubbed “Slow and S*%&@# Service Night,” with the goal of letting off some built-up steam in a safe and fun environment all while raising money for the Mountain of Hope Society.

The Columbia Valley knows Ullr Bar well. Its signature axe shaped door handles, viking helmets, and Nordic-themed hand-crafted cocktails have rendered them a staple within the community, only elevated by their indoor sanctuary laced with greenery and lights— a scene just magical enough to teleport each guest back to a simpler time. A time laced with communal victories shared over a cold pint, served by some of the best of the best.

This will be the first time Ullr hosts the Slow and S*%&@# Service Night, taking their beloved guests and team of expert servers and bartenders on a journey to a less-than-traditional night out. It couldn’t come at a better time either with tensions reaching an all time high as the ongoing global pandemic enters into its third year. Ullr will provide a safe space to release some stress while raising money for a bigger cause.

The event will be held by reservation only, to ensure that all those attending are prepared for the potentially offensive hilarity that will no doubt ensue. It is also to safeguard those walking in off the street from stepping into something they may not be prepared for. 

“There’s going to be swearing. There’s going to be off-kilter jokes. You’re probably going to get made fun of, but none of this is supposed to be aggressive. We don’t want anybody with hurt feelings,” says Richard Matthews, Owner and Events Coordinator for Ullr Bar.

“The main goal for us is for everybody to blow off a little bit of steam and have a little bit of fun. And more than anything, raise money for people in need in our community,” adds Matthews. “The idea is that you take a little bit of abuse so someone else gets the help that they need.”

The cover fee will be $20, to be paid upon reservation, with 100 per cent of proceeds going directly to the Mountain of Hope Society, a nonprofit organization that is dedicated to lending anonymous financial help to those in times of desperation. The society has been on hiatus for approximately the last two years, due to COVID-19 regulations and lack of public fundraising opportunities. Now, they are actively working to help  in-need Columbia Valley residents, which encompasses the area between Spillimacheen and Canal Flats, including the two local Indigenous bands, Shuswap and Akisqnuk.

Ullr Bar will be posting swear jars in the center of each table for the event, with the idea that if staff members catch you swearing, money goes into the jar- a dangerously fruitful concept, considering they will also be encouraging such offensive wordplay throughout the evening. 

Ullr didn’t stop there either. The establishment has also created a specialty “offensive” menu for the event, offering offensive drinks, food items, or even a custom made dunce cap for anyone wanting to embarrass a friend, total stranger, or even themselves. Offensive song requests or movie clips can also be purchased and dedicated to guests of your choosing. All proceeds from the swear jars and offensive menus will also be donated to Mountain of Hope Society. 

Although they are keeping it under wraps exactly what an “offensive food” might mean, Matthews did hint that, “there may be different shaped baked goods. Nothing harmful, but just something of a comedic value.”

If the profane language and embarrassment seems like too much for you, don’t fret. There is still a way to participate in the event through means of their exclusive “golden ticket.” For an extravagant fee of course, the ticket ensures your safety throughout the evening, void of all forms of abuse. “If there’s somebody at your table that really doesn’t want to be a part of it, or just wants to be treated like royalty, this is your golden way out,” says Matthews, adding that there are only a select few available.

There will also be three “celebrity servers” present at the event, Cory Archer, Angelika Weder, and Ian Solo, all of whom are local to the Columbia Valley and well known within the hospitality industry to guests and staff alike. Specific servers can be requested upon reservation, however, they will be honoured on a first come, first serve basis.

For those interested in attending, email [email protected] to reserve your table as soon as possible. Attendees are encouraged to bring cash, a positive attitude, and a thick skin.